Lessons learned......

ok.... I should really say Lessons I'm learning... :-)

I was part of the bible study Made to Crave by Lysa Terkeurst and I made it to 2 out of 6 but with Anna, and Samuel's pre-school I just couldn't make it to all of them. However I am still reading the book on my own and finishing the study, and every chapter speaks to me about something new. This following excerpt really spoke to me.

"I think alot of us try to get filled up with things or people. In Becoming More Than a Good Bible Study Girl, I talked about how I walked around for years with a little heart-shaped cup, holding it out to other people and things trying to find fulfillment. Some of us hold out our heart-shaped cup to food. Others demand that husbands love us in ways that right our wrongs and fill up our insecurities. Sometimes we expect our kids to be successful so we look good and have our worth validated by their accomplishments. Or we overspend our budget on an outfit we just have to have.

Whatever it is, if we are really going to stop circling the mountain and head north toward lasting changes, we have to empty ourselves of the lie that other people or things can ever fill our hearts to the full. Then we have to deliberately and intentionally fill up on Gods truths and stand secure in His love."

It made me think about what I use to try and fill up my "heart shaped cup" ...... Makes me question if i'm way to caught up in what the world views as important and not enough about what God thinks is important...... I know this is something I will be doing some pretty heavy thinking on...... and hoping to seek him more than things of this world....

YAY!! Summer vacation is here!! :-)

I am so glad summer is here. Samuel and Jonathan's last day of pre-school was this week and Joseph's last day was today. I am so excited to spend some relaxing time with my family without having to run around. I'm looking forward to staying up late with the kids and sleeping in..... :-) Although I am not a big fan of the heat, I do love summer vacation! As for other news the kids are doing great. My stepson Michael is here to visit for a little while over the summer break. We are enjoying having him with us and his brothers are so excited to spend this time with him.

Anna is growing big! She just had her 2 month check up a while back. When I told the pediatrician how she was sleeping 12 hours a night straight through and taking 2 naps, he said with a huge smile, "be careful what parents you tell that to...." I told him that after having 3 other children, 2 of which were still getting up several times a night until they were almost a year old, that I deserved one like Anna. :-) He agreed. :-) He said she is growing wonderfully and right on target!

Jonathan is growing up so much too. He is speech delayed due to ear infections during his first year of life but he is coming along great. We are going to potty train him this summer. His speech has improved so much and I feel he will do really well. *fingers crossed*

Joseph & Samuel are doing great as well. They are so happy to be done with school and looking forward to doing some fun things this summer. These are the pictures I took of them on their last days of school this week.

All in all we are doing great! I'm one blessed mama!

Im finally ready to share....

Well I didn't really share a whole lot about my labor of anna nor did I share our "first picture" and the reason is .... well it was a very difficult delivery and afterwards.

Now that I have fully recovered I decided to share that "first Pic" no matter how horrible I look! lol

But first my "story". I went in for an induction on a sunday evening and 3:00am the next day they found out Anna was breech. We are assuming she turned while I was being induced but we dont' know. I had gotten my epidural during the night around 4am but something was wrong. Every time they laid me flat I felt pain shoot down my neck and arms. I would tell the nurses but it was like no one knew what I was talking about as if no one had ever said it before. During the c-section it hurt.... they say "pressure" but it was pain.... and shortly after Anna arrived the nice anesthesiologist put me out while the doctor finished. I got to give her a quick kiss before I fell asleep.

I woke up in a fog and in the coming days something started happening. I couldn't lay down without pain shooting down my neck and arms and when I would sit up my head felt like it was going to explode. I had a spinal tap when sam was a baby and knew what a spinal headache felt like but this didn't feel like that, it was worse. I couldn't turn my head from side to side some times and other times I felt ok. I felt like I had been in a car accident and had severe whiplash by the 3rd day. They couldn't do much for me but give me pain meds until that night when they decided to do a blood patch. It helped a little and I finally went home 2 days later, 5 days after being admitted.

It was so hard when the boys would come in to see anna to only be able to lay there but it didn't hinder their excitement at all, nor mine as I saw that they were so excited to see her each time they visited.

It took about 2 weeks after she was born before I could move my neck without being in pain and due to the severity of my pain I was unable to nurse. I couldn't look down as I was nursing and we were having difficulty, so we are doing formula. It was very hard to make that decision but I knew it was what was best for Anna and me.

Even though it was a difficult experience I am so thankful she is here and healthy. My heart goes out to other moms when I hear they had to have a c-section and for those women out there who have issues from the epidural.

So here is our "first picture" It's not the one I wanted before hand, the ones i had with the boys with me smiling and hair somewhat done :-) but it is "our" first picture and I will treasure it because it shows me the day that I got to bring my sweet little anna into the world.

Update: I did find out that what I had was called a wet-tap. It happened when they placed my epidural and it affects your nerves.

Living with anna.....

Well Anna is 9 and 1/2 weeks old and things are going great. She has been sleeping through the night which has been absolutely wonderful!!! She sleeps 10 hours straight, well she has for the past week so I'm assuming this will continue. *fingers crossed*

Her brothers are still madly in love with her and talk to her all the time and still ask to hold her every day. They help me give her a bottle sometimes and they just love helping me with her.

She has brought so much joy into our lives and I know it will only get better!

I look forward to all the fun girl things we will get to do as she gets older..... and I look forward to all those mother/daughter moments :-)

Overall I just feel completely blessed!! :-)